A Goal-Setting System for the New Year
Every year when January 1st rolls around, people are setting resolutions. Whether you want to lose weight, start eating healthier, or change your life in some other way, the aspirations are high, but so is the rate of failure.
I stopped setting resolutions a few years ago, when I realized why so many people fail at their resolutions:
They are not specific. Wanting to eat healthier is great, but how are you going to do it? What does “healthier” mean to you?
They are not measurable. How are you going to know if you were successful at your resolution? How do you know when you’re eating “healthier?”
They are often unrealistic. We set resolutions with good intentions, but don’t take into account how difficult it is to make huge life changes, even with the best intentions.
They don’t speak to our true needs and desires. If you want to eat healthier this year – why? Dig deep into your reasons for choosing a resolution. Are you looking for some kind of external validation? Are you trying to fulfill an unmet need in some area of your life? If your resolution doesn’t match your truth, you won’t stick to it – and even if you do, it won’t resolve the deeper issue.
Although I don’t set resolutions anymore, I still aspire to be the best version of myself in the year ahead. I simply approach it a little differently to increase the chances that I stick with it and achieve my goals. Here’s the process I follow, which you can customize to create your own New Year’s ritual. The new year is a great time to do this, but you can do it anytime!
Setting Goals for the New Year (or the new month, week, or day!)
Review. I start by going through my calendar and noting the most important events in every month. Travel and any special or memorable events with family and friends get recorded here. As an example, this year I took trips to Tokyo, Sicily, Quebec, and Arizona; completed a 40 mile bike ride; started a renovation on my home; and completed an advanced yoga teacher training. In addition to these big events, I noted the races I ran, baby showers and weddings I attended, and smaller events that were meaningful to me in some way, like the first Orangetheory class I attended.
Reflect. After I’m reminded of the key events from the year in step 1, I reflect on different areas of my life – family, career, learning, wellness, community – by journaling a paragraph or a page about my experiences in that area, including things I was proud of and things that I wish had unfolded a bit differently. In this step, I’m calling attention to areas of strength and areas of opportunity. I’m a huge fan of technology, but the good old fashioned pen and paper are ideal for this exercise. Try to get in the flow when you’re writing – you may be surprised at what comes through the pen. This is where you’ll start to become aware of your patterns and what you would like to change in your life.
Plan. Review your reflections from step 2 for specific actions you can take in the upcoming year. What do you want to write in your reflection 365 days from now? Set specific goals that are easy to measure and realistic to achieve. In my reflection pages I was able to identify that I had read 19 books. I felt good about how much I had read this year and wanted to continue into next year, so I set a goal to read 20 books this coming year. Setting the number 20 allows me to easily know when I’ve completed the goal. Since I’ve already read 19 books in one year, I know that 20 is a realistic number. You can take this one step further to determine how you’ll get this done – like committing to read a few pages before bed every night.
Progress. Start taking actions on your goals today! Don’t wait until December to start reading – grab a book or head to the library and read a few pages before you go to bed. Try to form smaller habits that will help lead you to achieve your goals. If you miss a day, don’t beat yourself up for it, and don’t quit! Every day is a new beginning and an opportunity to try again.
Adjust. If you get off track with your goals, find a way to get back on track, or re-evaluate and change your goal entirely. Don’t give up just because you find that you’re behind schedule mid-year. Again, think about what you want to write in your reflection pages next year. Which of these would you rather write? “I got off track, but I did my best to catch up, and I was able to read 15 books,” or “I had only read one book by September, so I quit reading entirely.”
Repeat. There’s no rule that says you can only do this once a year – set an intention to review your goals once a month or once a quarter, or treat your birthday as a second New Year’s Day. Update your goals or set new ones. Don’t use the other 364 days of the year as an excuse not to move forward.
Bonus step: Share! If you believe they will support you, tell your friends and family about your goals. This will help you hold yourself accountable, especially if they check in with you throughout the year to see how you’re doing. You might even inspire them – I told a friend about my goal to read 20 books this year, and she set her own goal to read a certain number of books, too. Now we can hold each other accountable, share book recommendations, and add another common bond to our relationship.
What are some of your goals for the coming year? Do you have your own rituals for the New Year? I’d love to hear about them in the comments below!
